俺家儿子会写诗了

椒主

你儿子真是了不起，小小的年纪有如此的胸怀。画画的很好，诗写的也很美！好好培养吧，为你骄傲。
黎丽 发表于 2014-8-13 16:33

谢谢丽丽!
好久不见你，一定很忙吧？

superca

小朋友，真有才华，赞一个

椒主

儿子的COMEDY。
请问谁能看懂？

Title: Adventures of ME and You in Pokemans

Chapter 1:

---

-PROLOGUE-

Scene 1:

Me: It is me, ME!

Me: And it is you, ANTI ME!

Me: and you are?

AntiMe: Why does my heroic counterpart have to be this stupid...

Billl: And it is me!.. Wait why do we have to say our names? It's in script format... said Bill... The VOICE OF REASON.

Billl: Wait why are we in script format? said Bill... The VOICE OF REASON.

Everybody: No Idea!

-CHAPTER START-

I, AntiMe will no longer live in your shadow...

Or in script format..

So face the wrath of my unbeatable M DUO!

Go Metapod!

Oh no what is this vile creature you send out before I, ME

It is Metapod silly ME... wait... no no no not me... ME you no what nevermind.

Alright Metapod show him your sheer power...

*Cricket* *Cricket*

Ahha ME do you feel it pouring out?

The sheer power? ME?

OK I hate you, ME you make me sound like I'm talking to myself...

You no what now Metapod... Wait... NO METAPOD...

...

Alright you might have defeated my first Pokemans but My second will leave you #Dead...

Go Magikar... NOOOOOOOOOOOO MAGIKAAAAAAARP!

#firstworldvillainproblems

Fine you might have defeated me this time but you will not hinder my master plan Muahahahahahaha... AntiMe out!

#dramaticexit

Poof...

-CHAPTER TWO-

What happened ME? No not me ...ME Nevermind...

Oh not much Bobb just AntiMe..

An ant eyed you?

That is definetly an insult worth shedding blood for LET ME AT HIM! LET ME AT HIM..

Go ahead no one is holding you...

POOOF

Aha I am back it is me... No wait it isn't ME it is me... No me as in me, AntiMe not ME my good counterpart.. Me! not ME! you know what... screw you guys...

POOF

Wow.. I never knew being named ME has so many benefits... Can you teach me?

One day you will learn the secrets of ME... Not me.. ME.. This is getting so silly...

Poof

Alas it is me, again not ME AntiMe.. You know what I mean.

AntiMe why do you always do that? It's annoying..

What do you mean ME?

No not me... ME...

Oh btw AntiMe you should stop talking to yourself that's annoying too...

NO ME I wasn't talking to you guys... you know what I hate all of you...

Poof

There he does it agin the POOF thing.. It's hard to think when he does it...

Wait ME... you think?

Oh AntiMe you're back but you shouldn't make fun of yourself...

No not me... ME Do I have to spell it for you... "M" "E" wait it's spelt the same...

Nevermind.. It makes more sense if you are reading it...

No It doesnt... said Bill... The VOICE OF REASON.. No seriously his super name is VOICE OF REASON.

SHUDDUP BILL!.. I, AntiMe is tired of you...

but this is the first time you've seen me other than the Non Canon script prologue... said Bill... The VOICE OF REASON...

I, THE GRAMMAR NAZI detects bad grammar... NEVER START A SENTENCE WITH BUT!

But... argued Bill... The VOICE OF REASON

NO BUTTS YOU DID IT AGAIN _ dictated the GRAMMAR NAZI...

BUUUTTTT... whined Bill... The VOICE OF REASON

NO BUTTS YOU DID IT YET AGAIN _ I will wash your mouth with soap declared the GRAMMAR NAZI...

The bad cheap kind you get in CHINESE SUPER MARKETS _

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! cried Bill... The VOICE OF REASON

There that's better replied the GRAMMAR NAZI...

-CHAPTER END-

---

椒主

Chapter 2:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-PROLOGUE-

Prologue? SCREW IT!

-Chapter Start-

Aha I, AntiMe is back and you will never guess what I, AntiMe has up I, AntiMe's sleeve...

Will technically there's no sleeve...

But I, AntiMe is back and you will never guess what I, AntiMe has up I, AntiMe's sleeve...

Still there's no sleeve...

But...

NEVER START A SENTENCE WITH BUT screams the GRAMMAR NAZI

But I, AntiMe is back and you will never guess what I, AntiMe has up I, AntiMe's sleeve... A PLOT!

NEVER START A SENTENCE WITH BUT screams the GRAMMAR NAZI...

Wait Wait Wait... A PLOT? said ME

Yes we need a plot...

A PLOT? said bobb

Yes A PLOT!

But a plot?

NEVER EVER EVER START A SENTENCE WITH BUT OR I WILL TIE YOU TO A BUTT! THE BUTT OF A TRAIN AND SEND IT IN REVERSE screams the GRAMMAR NAZI...

But...

*Grabs Rope*



Pokemans Trainer ME would like to battle...

What happened AntiMe? Cried ME

Oh just a train accident...

ME used Insult...

Wait... why would I care about you?... Replied ME

Foe AntiMe's Self Esteem was lowered...

Oh Thanks for lowering my self esteem, ME

Me used Insult...

What Self Esteem? smirked ME

AntiMe's Self Esteem will not go any lower...

AntiMe fainted..

AntiMe is out of usable pokemans..

AntiM...

WE GET IT!

Wait what about the PLOT?

Poof.

ME... Our ratings have detected evilness in sector51

Really?

Yes really.. There is a cloud of evilness over the totally inconspicious dark tower... Our expert team of EggHeads at R&D are scanning the vincinity with Radar and a Freezer but there seems to be something quite off but we can't place our finger on it...

What about the umm... Tower? Inquired Bill the VOICE OF REASON

There's a giant death ray on it...

Sooooooo what are you looking for asked Bill the VOICE OF REASON

The evilness...

And?

The Villain

And?

Oh right... A PLOT.

-Chapter 3-

So back to the... Death Ray..

Our EggHeads have figured out what the Death Ray does...

Ummm Let me guess.. It does bad stuff guessed Bill THE VOICE OF REASON...

WITCH!

So now we are trying to figure out where the bad guy is hiding.

Ummmmm maybe the Tower? Suggested Bill THE VOICE OF REASON

No that would be too obvious...

-Crackle-

Aha I have jacked your big screen thing and I am broadcasting from my B.T.I.D.T.

BTIDT? asked Bill THE VOICE OF REASON...

GASP AntiMe? asked everyone else...

Yes It is me In my B.T.I.D.T.

BTIDT? asked Bill THE VOICE OF REASON... again..

Yes my Big Totally Inconspicious Dark Tower thing..

Right totally "too obvious" said Bill THE VOICE OF REASON

Shuddup...

Umm... did I, AntiMe miss something?

-CHAPTER END-


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 3:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-Chapter Start-

Umm? Where's the prologue? asked Bill THE VOICE OF REASON

What prologue?

You know the prologish prologue? asked Bill THE VOICE OF REASON

No Idea maybe the Writer removed it...

And have you noticed that there are alot of mistrkes in this book?

Like? asked Bill the VOICE OF REASON

Like wasn't your name supposed to be Billl?

...

And sometimes it's the VOICE OF REASON and sometimes it's THE VOICE OF REASON...

Ohhhh.. Since when did you become the Voice of reason? asked Bill THE VOICE OF REASON

Wait... Who are you? asked Bill THE VOICE OF REASON

I am... THE ALMIGHTY OMNIPOTENT NARRATOR...

OUCH!

What happened? Asked Bill THE VOICE OF REASON

Oh your THE ALMIGHTY OMNIPOTENT NARRATOR just stubbed his toe...

Wait don't you mean "Oh your ALMIGHTY OMNIPOTENT NARRATOR just stubbed his toe"?..

No no no my name is actually THE ALMIGHTY OMNIPOTENT NARRATOR with a "THE"

POOF

Oh that makes sense..

Ahhh! AntiMe when did you get here?... asked Bill THE VOICE OF REASON...

Ummm... when it said Poof?

Oh right... asked THE ALMIGHTY OMNIPOTENT NARRATOR,

Aren't you supposed to be in your B.T.I.D.T. thing?

Riiiiight... Wait... let me get my ninja smoke bombs that I picked up from the Flea Market...

POOF

So that's how you do it... asked THE ALMIGHTY OMNIPOTENT NARRATOR

Wait... Why did you ask? Aren't you OMNIPOTENT?... asked Bill the VOICE OF REASON

ummm... *changes subject* isn't the sky blue today?

We're floating in space right now... said Bill THE VOICE OF REASON

Oh Right... *Poofs Away*

Great not him too...

Wait... How am I supposed to get back now...

Help?

HELP?



Where's Bill? asked ME

...

MEH...



Maybe we should go take a trip to space... Suggested THE ALMIGHTY OMNIPOTENT NARRATOR

Why? asked ME

Ohhh... definitely not because I left Bill there... said THE ALMIGHTY OMNIPOTENT NARRATOR

5 mins later...

Oh! Hi Bill... Fancy seeing you here...

*Drags bill in ship*

Hi.. groaned Bill THE VOICE OF REASON

*whistles*

Poof

*sees AntiMe out of ship window...*

Oh Hi AntiMe... Kinda hard to scream in space eh?

Although you're doing a pretty decent job... remarked ME...

...

... Hello?

Can you here me?

No?

Well... See ya!

*Starts Engines*

5 mins Later...

Woot that was fun... said ME

Riiiiiight... groaned Bill THE VOICE OF REASON.

-Chapter End-


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 4:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-Chapter Start-

Battle Between ME and AntiMe started...

AntiMe sent out Seaking...

Soooo... is this like sushi?

*No Comment*

No? it's not like sushi...?

Anyways whatever you have AntiMe you can never defeat me... I am a bos..Seaking used MEGAHORN!...

NO SUSHI WHY!

WE WERE SO CLOSE!

ME fainted...

Seaking gained 578 xp...

SO it's not sushi...

NO IT IS NOT...

SO it is SUSHI?

Ahhh.. It is sushi...

No It is my new seaking, ME

You named your seaking after me... ME?

How nice of you but where do you get these wierd animals... I'm gonna have to call PETA2 on you...

...

Look it up...

...

Vhat? （印度口音What）

Poof

- LINE BREAK!

Okay We meet again ME

Now that I am in my completed BIG EVIL ELECTRIC ROBOT.

AKA B.E.E.R. for short... We will decimate you!

Where did you build that thing? asked ME

Ummm... the brewery?

And this time I hid the SELF-DESTRUCT button so well...

YOU WILL NEVER FIND IT! *INSERT EVIL LAUGH HERE*

Ummm does it happen to be that big inconspicious red button on your robot's face?

Argggghhhh.. Fine it is... You may have found it but you will never get to it...

This BEER responds to my own movements for quality control... Not the factory type...

There's a mosquito on your face! yelled ME

*Slap*

Awhhhhh... You tricked me!

No fair!

But good thing I predicted that I will fail...

I made an eject button just for this occasion...

...

Where's my eject button?

I swear I packed it in my lunch bag...

*sees celery instead of device*

MOM! _

*Blows Up*... Poof

Wow... That worked! wowed ME...

Poof Ha! I am back!

..._ Already? asked ME

Yes... and this time I got my Pokebot! Proclaimed AntiMe

No! Now you're turning into Team Rocket!

Yes except I will not fail! Muahahaha!

This genius design is stacked with all these things that I don't even need and blahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblah

So it must be a Electric/Steel type.. Said ME

Are you even listening? Shouted AntiMe

Huh?

Oh right battle... Hmmmmm

Okay.. GROUDON USE EQ!

EQ? Isn't that a game? asked AntiMe

No, EQ as in: An attack that inflicts the damage by shaking the ground. It is useless against Flying type Pokémon. -Stad

I know Me... I know... It was a joke...

Groudon used.. EARTHQUAKE

But I predicted it.. You see Me.. My Pokebot is built with such strong armor your attack is useless...

But this is a pokemon fanfic! And you're electric/steel ! whined ME...

Fine...

Pokebot hangs on thanks to Sturdy!

Darn it!

Show him what you're made of Pokebot...

Pokebot used Grass Knot..

*Grabs blade of grass*

*Ties around groudons Toe*

Roooooooooar!

Groudon fainted...

What? Protested ME

How does that little blade trip my Groudon?

ME handed AntiMe 500 Poke as prize money...

What... You can't just hand someone MY money!

Sure I can...

What?! Give it bac...ME is out of usable pokemon

Wait what? I still have the rest of my party...

ME blacked Out

Wait!? What? no I don...

*ME Falls Over*

-Chapter End-

椒主

小朋友，真有才华，赞一个
superca 发表于 2014-8-13 20:54

谢谢鼓励！

seaweed

谢谢鼓励！
只有12岁，没有人生阅历，内容有点空。
椒主 发表于 2014-8-13 13:31

孩子才是我们最好的老师. 人生的阅历只不过是给无奈的人生开脱的一种借口, 那才是空的

三重山讲的其实就是这个道理, 精明的人们总爱越过千山万水

- CHAPTER END- :p

椒主

孩子才是我们最好的老师. 人生的阅历只不过是给无奈的人生开脱的一种借口, 那才是空的

三重山讲的其实就是这个道理, 精明的人们总爱越过千山万水

- CHAPTER END-
seaweed 发表于 2014-8-13 22:23

越过千山涉过万水之后，口脑会不太Match。草能一直保持真实真不容易，赞！

青草地.

青草地，谢谢你推荐的网站，有很多有用的信息。
儿子来加拿大的时间不太长，累计4年多。他在四年级第二次抵加后，俺担心他跟不上，在四年级快结束时，俺去学校问他的老师他是否需要暑期补课，没想到老师说他接受很快，准备推荐他去考Gifted Program。在五年级时他以99%考起Gifted Program。
儿子是那种智商很高，情商偏低的孩子。俺不指望也不敢期望他将来能出人头地，只是希望他将来要走的路比俺的平坦一些。
椒主 发表于 2014-8-13 20:15

Gifted program is very good.
See some students from the program:
http://www.insidetoronto.com/community-story/53732-toronto-s-top-grad-dreams-big/
http://www.thetorontonews.com/articles/67/1/TDSB-graduates-make-their-mark/Page1.html
http://toronto.ctvnews.ca/toronto-high-school-student-wins-nasa-competition-1.397115

福慧

谢谢福慧，过奖了！
儿子和你一样是菩萨心肠。如果家里发现蚂蚁、蜘蛛等小虫子，俺让他清除掉，他总是一只只轻轻抓住放门外去。连苍蝇进门，他也只把它赶出门外。
俺不知道将来他怎么融入这个社会？
椒主 发表于 2014-8-13 08:28

找到了一个小知音:laugh: 一天晚上做花园，觉得手上很痒，一看是个蚊子，甩手他也不走，于是把手挪到嘴边用力吹，好家伙，小蚊子整个身子都飘起来了，那根针还死死的叮在手背上吸呢！

福慧

Birds

The birds they Fly

Past the limit..


Far Far Away.....
椒主 发表于 2014-8-13 08:33

这孩子，观察力真强，看第一副小鸟，眼里充满了爱和渴望！

福慧

回复 34# 椒主

这孩子说不定前世是莎士比亚:aplain: 还留有上一世的记忆:clap:

designer/draft

一天下午写了8首，这首花了7分钟，是不是很高产呀？  儿子的画The Final ExchangeEveryday we look..To the big blue sky..But what about everything we took...That makes our planet cry...
We reap the earth for our needs.We cut down all the trees.Some try to sow more seeds.But we're restricted by the fees.
As we spread out.The earth grows weak.As we hunt more trout.Way past the Peak.
The more we need.The more we take.The more we feed.For our own sake.
Fire and flames..Blood and Greed..Fun and games.Shout the creed!
Chemicals FloodDown this StreetShovel the MudTo plant your Wheat
Kick the ball.Down the field.Barricade the Mall.With your shield.
Buy more Food!To stuff it in the freezer.Not in the Mood...To help the old geezer
Slay The BEAST!And farm poor bees!Make More Yeast!To make more cheese!
We take all.And give nothing.When we fall.The earth will stop crying.
But for now we wait.For the day.Because it's not too late.Or else we'll pay.
The time is due.For us to change.It starts with you.It's not so strange!
So stand up!And start to change!Let's fill the cup!The Final Exchange!!!
椒主 发表于 2014-8-12 22:08

真棒！！！！！！！！！！！！！:thumbu::thumbu::thumbu::thumbu:

designer/draft

谢谢福慧，过奖了！
儿子和你一样是菩萨心肠。如果家里发现蚂蚁、蜘蛛等小虫子，俺让他清除掉，他总是一只只轻轻抓住放门外去。连苍蝇进门，他也只把它赶出门外。
俺不知道将来他怎么融入这个社会？
椒主 发表于 2014-8-13 08:28

小小年纪就有一颗菩萨心肠！不过建议让他多看看你家院子里被虫和小动物糟蹋掉的东西。

云高天阔

回复 =)
青草地. 发表于 2014-8-14 16:03

谢绝宣教！！ 此贴删除。

青草地.

谢绝宣教！！ 此贴删除。
云高天阔 发表于 2014-8-14 16:06

跟宗教有關的云版都删除?